So, the ugly - I have oral thrush. -.- Something was wrong with my tongue and when I googled it the most likely culprit was oral thrush. Gross. Went to urgent care Friday morning and they confirmed my suspicion and set me up with a 10 day prescription and I hope to god it works, … Continue reading The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
Category: Relationship
Choices
Tuesday I met with what would hopefully become my newly retained law firm. I was so nervous by the time I got there that I joked in the group chat with A & H that hopefully they wouldn't be too put out if I collapsed on their floor and became catatonic. The meeting didn't raise … Continue reading Choices
Beaming
Yesterday there was a 2 hour school delay. This was awkward, because I was supposed to be leaving for an appointment at the recruitment agency and now my youngest wouldn't be getting on her bus until after the start time for my appointment. I had to tell my husband that I had an appointment and … Continue reading Beaming
The Limits of Crowd-Sourcing
I am now dealing with a divorce while seeking to reenter the work force. This had me pondering which was worse - telling the recruitment agency I'm in the middle of a divorce, or withholding that information until the point I'm in the middle of an assignment and asking for time off so I can … Continue reading The Limits of Crowd-Sourcing
Reverting To Form
I was about to walk out the door to go meet M and have lunch at her place when my husband stopped me and told me he filed for divorce and that it should show up in the system today. So much for mediation. I told him the point of mediation was to do it … Continue reading Reverting To Form
Sensible?
So, I posted before about how my husband tried to get me to agree to a post-nuptial, and when I refused, had sent me a text giving me two ultimatums - find somewhere to sleep other than the walk-in closet, and report on my job hunt progress by 2-1-2020 or he was going to file … Continue reading Sensible?
Learning to Hope
Thursday I went to see my therapist. I knew he wanted to talk about the nightmare that had caused me so many issues over the beginning of the week - I think he also wanted to see if I had reason to believe I was in any real danger from my husband. Any time people … Continue reading Learning to Hope
Incendiary
Content note: mental health, self-harm impulses, disassociation So far, 2020 feels like I've strapped myself into a roller coaster that I'm not sure has passed safety inspections. It's been a hell of a ride in just this month, I can't imagine what the next 11 are going to look like. After Sunday morning's nightmare, I … Continue reading Incendiary
What Are The Odds?
I was thinking tonight how if I still believed in some kind of spiritual existence I'd have to assume that either H and I were meant to be together, OR the universe really has it in for him and wants to give him drama whether he will or no. We "met" online in 2012ish. I'd … Continue reading What Are The Odds?
Nightmare
Literal nightmare. I decided I'd focus yesterday around maintaining my good mood, and succeeded. It stayed good or pleasant the whole way through. Every time my brain would try to bring up a topic that was something that would hurt me or make me anxious I gently pushed it away or treated it with calm … Continue reading Nightmare
On A Good Day 