I was about to walk out the door to go meet M and have lunch at her place when my husband stopped me and told me he filed for divorce and that it should show up in the system today.
So much for mediation. I told him the point of mediation was to do it before filing. He said we could still do it after filing. I walked out and shut the door a smidgen harder than was necessary.
When I got to my car I was shaking so hard I had trouble typing on my phone to let M know I’d be a little late and update A & H on what had just happened.
Shortly after I arrived at M’s her husband called to let her know their realtor moved a showing of their house to a couple of hours earlier, so I quickly helped her finish cleaning and then we left to go have lunch at Panera instead of at her house.
This afternoon I left a voice mail for the mediator whose name I mentioned. I asked her if mediation can handle things like provisional hearings. She said it could, and she offered to look up my case. She confirmed it had been filed – and that he had a lawyer.
She recommended that I also consult with a lawyer.
That asshole hired a lawyer, filed for divorce months earlier than agreed, and made sure I didn’t have money to do the same.
I don’t think I can trust him to be cooperative with the mediation process and the clock is ticking.
H said, tonight, that his offer to loan me the money to retain a lawyer still stood.
I’m going to take him up on that.
On A Good Day 
Ugh. It seems illegal that he is controlling your joint money and assets. I hope you will get the help and wisdom that you need. You will get through this.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Even though it’s frowned on for him to do what he’s done (and might even be illegal), there’s not really anything much in place to prevent it or to penalize someone that does it, as far as I can tell.
Thank you, I really appreciate your kind words.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am so sorry you’re going through this. It’s such a nasty way to end a relationship. Good luck with lawyers – you will feel better with someone to handle the legal side of things who you feel is representing your interests.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, e.v. I agree – I will definitely feel better with legal representation. Right now I’m working on compiling a list of potential lawyers – at least now that I know I’m not restricted to working with lawyers that do payment plans my options have expanded!
LikeLiked by 1 person