I stopped posting for a bit due to a combination of lack of energy and not wanting to talk about what was happening out of an excess of paranoia that my ex might have found my blog and that I’d tip him off.
After the failed mediation, my attorneys advised me to get housing as soon as I could, and take the kids with me when I went. That way my ex couldn’t claim abandonment or control my access to them. I ended up finding a sympathetic ear at one of the apartment complexes I applied to and she helped get my application through and even lit a fire under the maintenance people so that an apartment would be ready two weeks faster – I need to get her a card and some flowers or something.
I tried to do everything as secretly and circumspectly as possible because I didn’t want to tip him off.
I was going to sign the lease on June 1st, but decided I’d move on the 6th, which wouldn’t seem like a suspicious date, and which I already had off.
I needed to get the kids out of the house without raising suspicion. So after school ended for them, I told them I’d be taking them out on the mornings of my days off. That meant I’d be out with them 3 times before the 6th, making the 6th seem like an innocuous part of a chain.
I had to get utilities put in my name, which gave me a couple of snags – first, I already had the electric in my name on our current apartment. I was afraid my new address would show up if I activated new service, so I had to ask my ex to switch it out of my name. He got excited and asked if I had an apartment. I flat out lied and said no, I was still searching and just prepping. I made it sound like it was being extremely difficult to find anything local that I could afford. THEN my gas company mailed something to his apartment a week later and he handed it to me and asked when I’d be moving.
I lied, again, and said if it didn’t fall through I had a roommate situation lined up with someone from work and that I’d be out by the end of June.
(To be continued – I’m losing focus for writing at the moment but wanted to get this update started!)