Monday was MLK Day. The kids had the day off school. My husband was home as well. I couldn't make phone calls while they were there but I knew my husband had planned another trip for laser tag. Once they'd left the apartment I started calling to price the services of local lawyers. It was … Continue reading Emotional Shock, Part 2
Category: Relationship
Emotional Shock, Part 1
This is a follow up to Growth and Interesting Times, Part 3. I couldn't do much on Sunday. Having realized that I was still in a better place now than I was 5 years ago I felt calmer, though. The courts were closed on Monday but I would probably be able to call local lawyers … Continue reading Emotional Shock, Part 1
Growth and Interesting Times, Part 3
Content note: suicidal ideation Friday was the start of a frigid winter weekend, and as the stress and trauma of the day had grown, my brain had started whispering to me that freezing to death seemed like a pretty mild way to go. Either you went to sleep or you went crazy, but either way … Continue reading Growth and Interesting Times, Part 3
Growth and Interesting Times, Part 2
When I'd been discussing my husband's latest salvo with A & H, I'd said I didn't intend to move out of my tiny bedroom. If my husband wanted me out, he'd have to physically remove my stuff. The kids would surely be curious and confused and he'd have to come up with an explanation for … Continue reading Growth and Interesting Times, Part 2
Growth and Interesting Times, Part 1
I was going to sleep the night of the 15th when I remembered my habit calendar. I'd downloaded it at the beginning of December because I wanted to be able to mark off the days until the 30th. I'd decided to keep it going in January but had fallen behind. As I marked off a … Continue reading Growth and Interesting Times, Part 1
The Upper Hand
Friday I went to see M (Indy). She's having a tough January - she got laid off after a merger, and she's been dealing with stress from her family. After I arrived she said her husband had contacted her and needed his second pair of work boots, due to having discovered a hole in the … Continue reading The Upper Hand
A Space Of My Own
I've got a bit of a headache right now, which is clinging to me in spite of having taken a couple of ibuprofen earlier. Worth it. I'd brought up to my husband that I had a solution to our sleeping arrangements. Not a great solution, but a solution. The boys weren't using their walk in … Continue reading A Space Of My Own
Telling the Kids & Making it Public
We told the kids on the 30th. I found it incredibly difficult to fall asleep and probably got 3 hours. We'd agreed to tell them around 10am, when everyone would be awake and have eaten breakfast. I'd recently installed Dragon Age: Origins, which I'd purchased during a Steam sale, so I finally loaded it up … Continue reading Telling the Kids & Making it Public
Flames On The Side Of My Face
So my husband wanted to go over the divorce paperwork. I'd already told him I wouldn't be filling anything out or signing anything, but it seemed important to him and I decided I'd go along with that. We walked over to the library, in silence most of the way except when we walked through a … Continue reading Flames On The Side Of My Face
Paradigm Shift
I had been a little more raw and emotional than usual in what I said in the group chat with A and H after leaving my therapist appointment. I apologized, sheepishly, and said that it was grounding to say something when my brain wanted to pick a direction and then drive until I couldn't. H … Continue reading Paradigm Shift
On A Good Day 