Thursday something occurred that felt nearly miraculous. My therapist expressed his opinion that I was doing so well that all I might need at this point would be the occasional session to check in and make sure everything was still okay. It's a little less than 2 years since I embarked on a journey to … Continue reading Recovery
Tag: mental health
I’m Not Dead Yet But I Don’t Think I’ll Take A Walk, Yet
Well, life changed in a big way. I got employment. I got my own apartment. I forced my ex to agree to 50/50 custody for the summer. My mental health improved significantly. I started dabbling with dating. My writing habit got derailed. We were supposed to have a final hearing for the divorce in September. … Continue reading I’m Not Dead Yet But I Don’t Think I’ll Take A Walk, Yet
High Anxiety
I haven't been around much. As my life and mood improved I found I needed writing as an outlet less and less. Plus, my laptop is behaving badly and typing this out on a phone is a massive pain. Going through a high anxiety day today and having to remind myself how many good days … Continue reading High Anxiety
Solid Ground
In 2015, easily one of the worst (if not the worst) years I had for depression and mental health issues, I felt like I was alone in the ocean, at night, with no idea which way to swim in order to reach land - just trying to float and wondering if I would go under. … Continue reading Solid Ground
Bits and Pieces, 5-22-2020
This format worked fairly well last time so I may stick with this going forward during this period where I don't get the energy to post daily. First off - ten years from now when my youngest is 18 and presumably interested in becoming an independent adult that does not spend all her time with … Continue reading Bits and Pieces, 5-22-2020
Bits and Pieces
I was so devastated at the idea of working retail. I sucked it up and applied for a job and I ended up working at a grocery store in a pandemic. That sounds pretty terrible on the surface of things. So it's a little surreal that when I'm at work I'm the most at peace … Continue reading Bits and Pieces
So Many Feelings
H introduced me to something called synthesia / black MIDIs which is basically music that builds up into cramming as many notes as possible before sanity or the computer breaks down. H likes it - I think I'd have to be very heavily caffeinated and high on life before I could actually enjoy it as … Continue reading So Many Feelings
Mediation
I left the house a few minutes early, moved my car so it wasn't right next to our building and joined the Zoom meeting. The paralegal standing in for my lawyer explained that my lawyer was on a hearing at the moment and would join in a bit. What she expected to take her 30 … Continue reading Mediation
An Unwanted Visit
I have another 4 days off in a row. This will be followed by 4 days working. I'd rather the shifts were spread out a little more, though, as even just a 4 day stretch trapped in quarantine with my ex is mildly insanity inducing at best. Last night I was consoling myself that at … Continue reading An Unwanted Visit
Oops
I realized recently that some of my posts (because they're written as a public journal, emphasis on the journal) include statements that are likely to be confusing because they're missing context. So, trying to come up with a short biography for people that might be newer to reading here. I was home schooled and raised … Continue reading Oops
On A Good Day 