I haven’t been around much. As my life and mood improved I found I needed writing as an outlet less and less. Plus, my laptop is behaving badly and typing this out on a phone is a massive pain.
Going through a high anxiety day today and having to remind myself how many good days I’ve been having and how I haven’t had one of these in a while, and that just because it’s happening today doesn’t mean it will be happening tomorrow.
Struggling with feeling lonely and forever alone, like I will always turn out to be too much for the people in my life. I’ve tried to make my peace with the fact that good things are often transient, and learn to enjoy them while they’re here and let go and move on when they’re not, but every time I’m confronted with a lost connection, or the possibility of losing a connection I care about, I still have to deal with the pain and anxiety that brings.
So here I am, channeling my angst into words again in the hope that lessens the weight.