Set out for a walk just after 9pm hoping it would help me relax before bed and about ten minutes in, the following occurs:
Brain, anxiously: “What if a serial killer grabs us from behind and starts strangling us?”
Stress response system: “Adrenalize! FIGHT MODE ENGAGED!”
Me, definitely not relaxing now: …
Brain, cynically: “You know we’d be rubbish at fighting back, we’re just gonna die.”
Me: spends next 15 minutes of walk thinking of ways to try and deliver pain as quickly as possible to hopefully surprise strangler into releasing me.
By the time I reached what I’ve dubbed the Wizard’s Lamp Post I was laughing at how my plan to relax had thoroughly backfired.
After turning around to head home, I was surprised to spot a mouse on the trail in front of me. It just sat there and stared at me, looking glassy eyed and grumpy, and I pondered if it was diseased and dying. I decided I’d take a couple of pictures, regardless, and after the second time the flash went off the mouse, apparently disgusted with my rudeness, loped off into the grass.
I’m home now, unstrangled but wide awake and definitely not relaxed. On the plus side, there are bats that fly around our new apartment complex and it is awesome!