Last night I was sore for some unknown reason, because meat suits are terrible, and I couldn’t stay asleep because of it. I got up before 5am and took an aspirin and went back to bed, which improved my sleep so much that I actually had a proper REM cycle.
I proceeded to dream about getting chased by an enormous sentient alligator / crocodile creature that could read because apex predators that are so good at what they do they haven’t needed to change for millions of years aren’t scary enough on their own, my brain has to turn them into sentient readers.
I already find alligators and crocodiles terrifying, and you know this, brain, I don’t know why you thought you needed to do this to me.
My brain did not decide to allow me to be eaten, which I wouldn’t put past it, given that my brain has let me dream about being dead and discovering my own body. Instead the dream resolved with people convincing the alligator/crocodile thing to eat the zombies infesting the river. No, I don’t know why there were zombies infesting the river, but apparently the alligator/crocodile thing found them very flavorful.
I both hate and love my brain.